Are you a Peeker? Someone who reads blog posts like these and the words hit a heart string or you feel something like butterflies in your tummy. Someone who is really fired up by these posts yet they don’t seem completely fit with your life. Do you read and feel connected, but in you think its not possible for you. Your not good enough? Smart enough? Creative enough? You might be thinking words like…”Wow, look at how successful that person is. I am forsure not doing something as great/cool as them)” “I could never just do that “I wish I was there” etc. Do any of the above fit you?
First off, I love peekers. Why? I was and I still am a peeker. I remember the first time I read this post, I answered the questions I was crazy inspired, but I wasn’t sure of my next move. My whole life I had just gone on with the next expected thing. The logical choice. The secure choice. I had honestly never asked myself any of these questions and for some reason I was afraid of them. BUT. This post also hit lots of heart strings and my cheeks even got flush as I felt a bit woozy. I believe this was the crack that I needed. The crack to give myself a real try at getting to what was at my core.
Now peeking can take us two directions. First, it can inspire our hearts to action. Now to you that are on the brink of action, I really encourage you to take one step. One step in the direction that your gut says, but maybe doesn’t make sense in your head. This is exactly what I felt attending the first Making Things Happen. Quit waiting for everything to be perfect and leap. Is it coming on the MTH tour? Is it buying that piece of equipment? Is it hitting publish on a post? Whatever that one step is. Take one more towards it today and if you are afraid email me, I want to hear you and encourage you. I was there, and still am. I still have to put my heart out there, even though its scary. Yet, I have hope that I will be able to write another post like this in 6 months from now, shocked. So, let’s stop just peeking and take the leap together.
Second, peeking can bring on comparison. Looking at what others have and seeing the grass as greener on the other side. But remember, You were not made to fit into a box, let alone someone else’s life. I have learned some big lessons in the last weeks in this area. In my early days of being a peeker, I was always getting discouraged. Others success = my failure. Which I know now is completely disordered thinking, but after years of thinking like this it takes work to shut those words off. Whether, I take a step back from facebook or repeat to myself…..Gina, your path is NOT their path. It still comes up. Lately, others success has come up again as a sore spot, even with some my best of friends. This icky part of me was rearing its head and I couldn’t understand it or get ahold of it. I was ashamed of it.
Until. I listened to this sermon while on a run (running without techno/rave music is a total grace from the lord, that I have never been able to do before) and I almost stopped dead in my tracks when these words hit my ears. “O how vulnerable the fallen human heart is — mine is — to feeling that having lots of things equals being really alive. Life is not having things. Life is knowing God.”
This was the answer I prayed for. This is where my icky feelings were coming from. I was believing that all the things that others had and I didn’t I equated life that I was losing. Life that I didn’t have because I didn’t have things. “This person is booking more weddings, and I am losing life because I don’t have as many.” “This person is so successful, I am losing life because I don’t have theirs.” All of this is a big FAT lie.
A big fat LIE to all of us.
The TRUTH :: THINGS (success, looks, money, work) DON’T EQUAL LIFE.
AND IF WE DON’T HAVE SOMETHING OR DON’T GET SOMETHING WE ARE NOT LOSING LIFE.
I believe this from my very core, but I still have to guard my heart and the old thinking comes knocking at my door. So you peekers, I want you to know that you have all the pieces you need. You don’t need someone else’s things. You have a beautiful life, dig in and find the gold. It might take you time to slow down and just be. You might just need a little nudge. This is my nudge. Stop thinking your not ready or its too late.
Your life is here and now. In your hands. What are you going to do with it?