OUCH! I scream as I slice my finger this morning, cutting my current food obsession, an avocado.
My entire life I have always heard this from my mother. Gina SLOW down. Whether it is talking too fast or trying to get 800 things done in a minute. I guess I have always been the type of girl that wants to do ALL the things. ALL at once.
To be honest this is where my brain has been the last couple of days. ALL THE THINGS, not enough time. ALL THE THINGS that need to be done right now in a 27 minute nap. ALL THE THINGS to do right this moment, as I would like to get to bed before 2am. All the THINGS so I can settle down and finish my 2015 goals and write that post. ALL THE THINGS. The panic, the stress, the getting short with loved ones and helpers around me, the disappointment with myself for getting here all out of whack, the I can’t’s. It’s a slippery slope.
Then my loving Father in heaven brings me out of my tail spin with a quick slice to an appendage. “SLOW DOWN” I hear again. “SLOW DOWN, Gina.” I relax a bit and realize. I DON’T want ALL THE THINGS. I can’t do ALL THE THINGS. When they are ALL THE THINGS.
I can only do one baby step at a time. One leap of faith. One deep breath. One email. One photo. That’s how we get real things done anyways. I am a MASTER at juggling, hustling and multitasking. But this year…. I don’t want to be.
I want to have a year of setting up systems in our new normal as a family of 3. Being parents together, a working momma, a serving wife and loving friend. Taking notes and time to see what rhythms work and don’t work. I want to tune into the Lord everyday to see HIS will for me, BEFORE I OPEN MY COMPUTER. To have an actionable list and get things done but leave WHITE SPACE for what the Lord has for us that day. Leave white space for giggles, for serving others, for taking a bath, for giving.
It’s going to take a lot of work to figure out how to slow down for this momma. For example in writing this post I have made and eaten lunch, lactation cookies, filled up water bottles and put another bandaid on this finger. It’s going to take preparation, to GIVE ME SPACE to breathe. It’s going to take clean spaces not filled with clutter to work in. It’s going to take pre-visualization and notes. It’s going to take a huge amount of simplifying which is a big goal for 2015.
But today I needed to declare. I am done doing ALL THE THINGS. I am sick of walking into my days with the mindset that I don’t have enough. Enough time, brain space, energy….with Jesus I have enough. Even with the mountains of work and home and a no-napping baby. I will repeat my favorite mantra lately. GOD IS NOT SURPRISED. God is not surprised at what is on my plate. He just asks for my hand to walk with Him to accomplish it.
And somedays He just has to pull out a kitchen mishap and the bandaids to remind me.